Goldfish, Thongs, and the Cutest Sweater Ever!

I have the day off work today, which means there is no way I'm staying cooped up at home all day. The only problem is that Jackson has a pretty nasty cold right now, so playing with friends was out of the question. I decided putting him in his stroller and taking him to the mall would be a good idea. I mean, honestly, how many people could he infect from his stroller, right? We're at the mall and he's doing great riding in the stroller. We get to the food court and I get Panda Express. I have my Orange Chicken bowl and medium Pepsi on my tray in one hand and I'm pushing Jackson in the stroller with the other hand. This, by itself, should be an Olympic sport, but then my receipt falls off the tray. I bend down to pick it up with my cat like balance and my Pepsi slides to the edge of the tray. It doesn't fall off. All is good. (Why, you ask, didn't I just leave the receipt on the ground? Because my mom taught me that it's not okay to just drop something and leave it there, and the 110 taught me to leave everything cleaner than I found it, these 2 things combined have turned me into a rather neurotic person, but that's a different blog) By now, several people are watching me do my balancing act. I start to think that maybe instead of staring, they could HELP me. I get about 5 feet from an empty table and 2 guys come up to me and ask if I need help. I was almost to the table by that point, so I declined. But thank you 2 random guys, for restoring my faith in humanity. Jackson and I are sitting and eating, when a lady comes up to me and asks if she could sit at our 4 person table. I look around and there are TONS of empty tables all around us, but what was I supposed to say, "no"? So, I just look at her and say "uhhhhhhh.....sure". She sat down and didn't say another word, just ate her fried wontons very loudly. We finished lunch and Jackson is still doing well, so I decide to walk around some more. I gave him a big plastic container filled to the top with goldfish crackers. THAT should hold him over for a while! We go to Baby Gap, The Children's Place, Hannah Anderson, Janie and Jack, and Gymboree. All of the places where kids are welcome. He's doing so well....such an angel sitting in his stroller, looking around, keeping his hands to himself. He's doing SO well, in fact, that I think he could go to a grown up store, without causing any problems, so we head to a favorite store of mine....Victoria's Secret. I walk in and the sales person (who had a BAD case of the hiccups, BTW) tells me all about their specials. Then Jackson decides to pick up his giant container of goldfish and dump the entire thing on the floor....of Victoria's Secret....So there I am, on my hands and knees, picking up goldfish. Meanwhile, Jackson thinks this is great and is finding everything else in his reach to throw on the floor so I can pick it up. Thongs, even more crackers, his milk, bras....everything. We hauled ass out of there. I just want to make one last stop through Macy's. I don't really like that store that much, but I'll just do a quick loop through, then we'll head home. That's when I saw it! THE CUTEST SWEATER EVER!!! It was a light gray ruffled cardigan, and they had 1 small left. I stood there admiring it and another lady comes up with light gray jeans in her hand and starts looking at it too. I tell her, "I'm so in love with this sweater!" She said she likes it too and she was going to get it in oatmeal, but now that she's getting these gray jean, she thinks the gray sweater would be better. I tell her that they do go together well, and .....wait, did she say they have it in other colors? I go around there corner to see what other colors they have it in. I found the oatmeal one, but gray really is more my style, so I go back to pick it up and THAT BITCH TOOK MY SWEATER! And there is no effing way she could even fit into a small anyway, who is she kidding?! I make a dive for the last oatmeal colored one, try it on, and it's just as cute on me as on the hanger! I call my sister and mom to get their opinion (which, really just means have someone tell me I really do need the sweater, so I don't feel so guilty) they both tell me I should get it. I get to the check out, and the cashier gives me a coupon for 20% off! It's fate! We were meant to be together.